I posted this on my Facebook page in December of 2019. It's probably the best explanation of #takethedamntrip...
I haven’t posted about my birthday this year. See, I was waiting till we had the “last” celebration that Mark had planned, which was a dinner out with friends to eat, drink, and play cards on Friday, December 6th. I love birthdays in general and he was committed to making my 40th extra special.
Back in May, for Mother’s Day, Mark gave me a few bottles of Bordeaux wine and a card, written in French (Mark did not speak French so I knew something was up.) He then told me we were going to Bordeaux for my 40th birthday, just the two of us. It would be the first time we were both away from both kids. We would be on the ground for less than 48 hours, flights were long, and we would have two of my sisters to watch the kids.
For all intents and purposes, it sounded a little crazy.
When I told people about it, they couldn’t believe we were going to France for a WEEKEND. Even I wondered if it was silly and crazy to do that. But Mark was so proud and excited for what he had planned (complete with a walking tour he had researched that would take us through a good chunk of the city). So I trusted that, even if it was crazy, it would be wonderful.
A few days before we left, we talked about how much we’d miss our kiddos and I asked “should we cancel?” We both laughed, we packed our bags, and we headed off to France.
At some point I’ll say more about the actual trip but I’ll just say that overall it was wonderful. I got to spend my birthday with the love of my life, eating delicious food, drinking great wine, and wandering through a beautiful city.
Six days later, my love did not wake up.
I’m so glad we did the crazy thing, took the trip, spent those precious days together. I recently found one of the birthday cards he’d given me and it said “I hope this birthday is one to remember for a lifetime.”
My whole world has been turned upside down and sometimes I don’t know how to breathe in this new reality and every choice seems impossible. But I’m glad we made that choice, to be together on an adventure.
In other words, when posed with a choice, take the damn trip.